No More Excuses

We all make excuses. Whether they cover up for why we were late (“There was no parking”), provide a reason as to why we didn’t do that errand that our spouse requested (“It didn’t get into my to-do list”), seek to justify why we broke our diet (“There we SO many sweets on the table”), or attempt to explain why we didn’t get the business deal (“My competition swept in and undercut me”), we use excuses throughout our day to justify our errors and explain away our failings.

The reason that we do this, according to psychologists, is to protect ourselves against anxiety and shame. It is simply easier to blame external factors than ourselves for our lack of achievement or for letting ourselves or others down. The problem is that the more that we make excuses, the likelier we are to build barriers that will impede our chances of attaining meaningful goals in the future.

While excuse making is common problem for everyone, it can be particularly problematic for leaders. Leaders are responsible for their own work as well as those that they lead. When leaders excuse away failures, they lower the standard at which they operate, which will inevitably reduce their productivity and impact. Worse, such behavior helps to create a culture of excuse-making that quickly trickles down the pipeline. In no time, people throughout the organization feel vindicated in justifying their miscues or lack of production. And if the boss makes his/her own excuses all the time, who is going to call them on it?

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Starting Out? Take Lots of Vitamin “C” (and Hopefully You Won’t Have to See the Doctor)

The decision to hang a shingle and start a business can be one of the most exciting choices that a person will ever make. Few experiences can match the thrill of opening your own enterprise and crafting it your way, in your vision. Yet, becoming an independent provider can also present many risks, not the least of which is fiscal viability. Whether you have worked for years as an employee or are just starting out, there are certain things that you need to know and do in order to become recognized, respected, and, most importantly, able to generate a meaningful income from your business.

Today’s marketplace is unlike any other in history. On the one hand, there is more opportunity than ever before. For example, Web 2.0 has extended our reach and allowed us to go global with our merchandise, skills and services. We can put ourselves out there and let everyone know that we exist and stand ready to serve. The problem, of course, is that these same tools are available to your competitors as well. Moreover, there is always someone else in the Great Beyond that is doing what you seek to do, but doing it better and for longer than you have. How can you distinguish yourself and begin to develop a solid suite of services and a trusting client base?

In order to be successful, I suggest that you take lots of “Vitamin C” and think in the following terms: Clarity, Credentialing, Customization, Contributions, Communication and Connection, Celebration, Collection, Community, Confidence, Charitableness and Cushion.

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Naphtali HoffComment
To be Successful, Learn to Burn Your Boats

At its essence, burning boats represents a point of no return, a psychological commitment where the party involved recognizes that they have crossed a line never to cross back. There is no hedging, no looking over one’s shoulder. Everything now – all thoughts and efforts – must be focused on succeeding in this new reality.

Hebrew tradition teaches a similar value. In ancient times Israelite armies would besiege enemy cities from three sides only, leaving open the possibility of flight. They understood that so long as the enemy saw that they had an escape route available, they would not fight with utmost earnestness and energy. In most cases, this played right into the besiegers’ hands.

Whether we face a true crossroads or simply want to achieve great things in our careers, personal lives, or both, it is imperative that we approach our decisions with a level of commitment that will drive us definitively forward. And if you lead others, you need to find a way to gain their commitment as well, to ensure that you work together towards your common goal of success. 

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Naphtali HoffComment
The Millennial in Me

In a piece for Forbes, contributor Liz Ryan extolled the Millennial Way, or at least some of the logic behind it. In her column, Ryan sought to assuage concerns of baby boomer parents and frustrated executives, telling them that Gen-Y’s approach to life and their attitude about employment is healthier and more balanced than we think and something that all of us should have done years ago. “Anyone who argues for a more human-centric approach to work,” she wrote, “is a hero in our book, and that quality is what millennials are most well-known for. They aren’t willing to fall in line and take a lousy job just to get an apartment that’s the envy of their friends. What good would the apartment do them, if they hate their job and therefore hate their life?”

In her well-articulated defense, Ryan highlighted two millennial propensities: an aversion to drinking the corporate Kool-Aid and a capacity to reinvent themselves as circumstances and interests warrant.

Our youngest workers, she writes, were just getting started (or thinking about doing so) when corporate scandal and widespread layoffs punctured their parents’ golden balloons. The promise of peace and prosperity in exchange for decades of hard work and sacrifice to the corporate cause went up in recessionary smoke. Now, their children, fresh off of an economic near-collapse that almost shattered their own dreams and still put many of them on hold, remain uncommitted to the corporate credo, an irreverent quality that sends tremors of fear down the spines of upper management. 

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Naphtali HoffComment
Are You a Travel Agent or a Tour Guide?

Over the summer months millions of people worldwide spent time vacationing, traveling and sightseeing. As many travelers were largely unfamiliar with their desired destinations (assuming that they even know where they want to go), they needed to rely heavily on the knowledge and experience of two kinds of travel professionals: travel agents (for those who still use them) and tour guides. Despite the proliferation of online content (not to mention booking and other tools), many folks still lean on professionals to guide them through the travel experience.

While both serve important, related roles in ensuring an enjoyable vacation experience, there are some significant differences between them. For starters, agents do their work on the front end of the travel process. In contrast, only after the decision is made to visit a particular locale can a tour guide be engaged for service. Second, travel agents often sell vacation packages to destinations that they have never visited. A tour guide, on the other hand, needs to be intimately familiar with any area that they service, including its history, culture, venues, best times to visit attractions, etc. No tour guide can lead others effectively without having been there first and studying its details thoroughly. Nor can they just hand their clients a map or GPS for the day together with some pamphlets. They need to be present throughout the process both physically and mentally, guiding, teaching and sharing their passion about each place that they visit.

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Naphtali HoffComment
Make Feedback Normal

Feedback has been famously called “the breakfast of champions.” We all need feedback to optimize performance and make sure that we are doing our jobs correctly. Yet, ask most professionals to play the game of word association with the word “feedback” and you will often hear such negative words as fear, anxiety, and evaluation.

The concern, interestingly, does not lie exclusively with employees. Many leaders are as uncomfortable giving feedback as their direct reports are in receiving it. According to a survey conducted by Management Concepts, supervisors often feel uneasy advising their employees on how to improve their performance, even the high performers.

Why are so many leaders afraid to share their thoughts and why has the process resulted in such concern among employees?

Perhaps the problem lies mainly in the way that feedback is perceived. For many bosses, feedback is simply not a priority. When compared to the many urgencies on their list (real or imagined), they simply do not approach feedback with the same seriousness and preparedness.

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Naphtali HoffComment
Goodbye to the Mystery

My wife and I sent our oldest child off yesterday to study for a year abroad. The day was filled with many of the emotions that filled our parents when we went off for our first study years twenty-plus years ago. We spent time at the airport reviewing protocol, getting everything checked off and enjoying a few final moments together before he went off to security. And then we waved our last in-person good-byes from behind the gated area as he meandered down the corridor to his flight gate.

But there was something different about this experience than what we and our folks experienced back in, as my wife is fond of calling them, the “olden days.” Back then, we owned no cell phones. Letters and pay phones (collect calls through an international operator, no less) were the primary ways that we communicated. And often long periods would pass between an experience and our ability to share it with loved ones back home (a particular challenge during the Gulf War). It was understood that we would communicate every so often and that it would be at a time when we could take a few minutes out of our busy days to share news and updates.

Now, the game has changed completely. No longer is there any wait time. Even yesterday, as my son’s native cell phone failed to work, we were able to communicate in real time with him and his driver via a friend’s phone and then, when his American phone was activated, WhatsApp. There was no mystery. No “You’ll never believe what happened when I got off the plane”. No, “School is great and I need more …” It was all unfolding in real time and that’s how we expect that it will continue to be, with pictures, videos and lots of texting replacing much of the calls and conversation.

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Naphtali HoffComment
Five Takes from Today's Eclipse
  1. You need not be large to make a huge impact (moon)
  2. Location and position matter more than we think (totality)
  3. Danger is often imperceptible, at least at first (IV rays)
  4. When unusual things happen, they needn’t last long to be noticed
  5. If you want to get the most out of life’s offerings, make the proper preparations
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Naphtali HoffComment