Small Gestures Go a Long Way (Let It Go, Part II)

My "Let It Go" video post got such a powerful response.

I think it's because there was a rawness to the message.

The idea that we could be hurt and hurt in serious ways and it's really up to us to decide how we want to move forward.

Many of us hold onto things and we just have a hard time relinquishing the pain because we feel that if we let it go somehow that's going to vindicate the other side. And we need to remember that letting it go is primarily for us.

Because if we let it go, then we can start to heal, and we can start to move forward. We can start to think differently about what occurred and what our future holds for us.

I shared that that particular time - about six years ago - was a very difficult time for me and my family. We were transitioning on many levels.

New community. For me it was a new profession. And I was hanging a shingle and starting from scratch and it was just a difficult time to get everything in place.

I came to a new community where I didn't know anybody, and it just didn't feel like things were moving in the right direction.

Just in general.

The way that my previous position had ended. The way that we had left our old community.

It was just so easy to point fingers.

But I wanted to share a positive story that kind of, to me sort of turn things around. It was nothing major. But it was a gesture and the gesture went a long way to help me personally feel like I belonged.

And it was the beginning of a new chapter in my own personal story, if you will.

What happened was as follows.

The Sukkot holiday is in total a nine-day holiday. The latter part of it is technically a different holiday. It's where instead of sitting in the sukkah, in the hut, the focus now becomes the celebration of the Torah, the celebration of the completion of the annual reading of the Torah cycle.

On that day, called Simchat Torah, there is a custom to read a variety of verses which speak to the beauty of the Torah and the beauty of that connection. And oftentimes it is an honor that is sold to somebody for charity. And then that money goes to whatever cause it is. The person who buys it has the ability to distribute verses to different people within the congregation.

I had met somebody that holiday. He didn't know me particularly well but was kind enough after buying it to give me one of those verses. And the people who called me, or said that next verse to so and so, they didn't even know my name at the time.

But it was the beginning of me starting to feel like I belonged.

And I'm sharing this because sometimes we think, well, what's the big deal? I'll just give this person a verse. I'll give this person a something. A little handshake here. A little smile over there. And we don't think something of it. We don't think something significant of it for sure.

Oftentimes, however, it's that little gesture that can make a huge difference to somebody who's struggling.

Whether they're struggling just to deal with their day or they're struggling with something much bigger.

Small acts of kindness, small acts of consideration, of care, can go a really, really long way.

I try to remind myself off that all the time and because we're coming up on the anniversary, if you will, of that incident.

I wanted to sort of wrap around back to the "Let It Go" piece because when we can let things go on our own end, we have more to give to other people. And when we give to others, even, again, if it's something as simple as a hello, a good morning, a how are you doing, a here, let me give you something, whatever that something is, whether it's tangible or not, then we are really giving that other person a gift.

Ultimately, we're giving ourselves a gift that we don't even realize. Because when you are good to others, that energizes you and empowers you. It clears your mind. It creates positivity.

There are so many positive side benefits for you, let alone for the other person.

So, as we come onto the new holiday, and at the same time as we just think about how we can continue to do good and be good to others, think about the small gestures you could do when you're getting on the bus or the train this morning or interacting with a coworker or meeting up with somebody in your community, in your synagogue, in your church, wherever you connect with people in your house, with your own family, what could you bring to the conversation that's going to lift the spirits of somebody else?

Especially because we never know somebody's situation and we could be here doing a huge favor for them without even knowing it. This guy who did it for me had no idea of the impact.

But when I shared it with him afterwards, we both got emotional because we both realized the impact of the behavior.

Let’s continue to do good and be good. Share that goodness with others and hopefully we'll not only have a happy holiday, but we'll have a happy day, year, life because we're living a life of giving, a life of letting go, and a life of prosperity.